Just as what Russel said, he didn't know that what he did was that good to be praised, I have felt that too - today. Cannot believe that I have grown that much in these 49 days, and it hasn't ended yet. Well, I would expect a leap growth in me as this Jesus Bride 4 draws to an end. I just gave some cheap food as presents which I know I would not have done when it was the old me. However, I did not see it as something to be praised for. Now, looking back, I just so many things to thank God for. Never ending to be specific. Even small sweet things like immediate buses, short distance
tom pang are just so significant in my life at that point of time.
Well, it is seriously time to die to myself and reach out to love people and be ready to get hurt. I think that this feeling is just not as real when watching shows compared to the original experience. God's heartfelt feelings for us all the time. He wants to be our or rather, my husband. Am I ready? The ring on my hand just doesn't mean anything to me. It is not possible for me to get intimate without getting hurt huh. Maybe I should seriously ask for a boyfriend now so that I can bring imagination to a higher level. I just cannot imagine loving someone so much that I cannot let go. Doubt I ever felt that before. LOVE is a common yet distant word for me. Cannot be grasped. I should also ask for disciples now to experience it. Come forth disciples - from all over the world!!!
face it! don't run away!!! Woohoo! I am a young powerful prophetess in the making!!! Series of events...
Thursday
Got rebuked by my aunt for dishonouring her. Didn't know I had a problem of honouring people. Was singled out. It went deep into my spirit. Wanted to change. Got out and spoke my thought and confessed my sins. Clinton prayed for me and I broke through.
Friday
Thought was the end, but not. Got rebuked early in the morning at 5am that I shouldn't stay in jealousy. Should imitate clinton and he imitates Christ. Made a deal with my aunt to go out and speak and pray for those who go out and speak together with my sister. We went out and wanted to pray for the person but got a surprise instead. Clinton prayed for us to release us to prophesise to others, making our vision come to pass. He was there to teach me to prophesise to my first guinea pig, my small mentor, ming hui jie jie. Prayed in tongues for very long but could see nothing. Finally did and it was very zun.
Did a lot of prophesying on that day. I was even blindfolded. I also prophesied over pastor. So cool and fun and powerful. The whole experience was very exciting. People even came up to me to ask me to prophesise. I know it is very humbling to do so.
Saturday
Had a sheep!!!! Haha. I have become a small mentor by praying over justin to have a spirit of prophesy. Damn cool haha. But how? My beloved brother...
Today
Had doubts since the day I started prophesying. I don't know how long I can keep it up. I had to deal with myself not to be proud and not to loose faith. By prophesying to so many people, I know God's heart more and can see His great power and His unlimited blessings for us. In a way, I got closer to God. =) Thank you Jesus, Allos Parakletos, Abba Father.
ai wo arigatou 
